Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Tomorrow Came Too Soon!

Tomorrow is the day I go back to work.  I am soooo sad.  I LOVE my mornings with my little man.  He is so cheerful and awake but still groggy enough to let me hold him and rub his back for awhile.  I love that part.  He loves when I change his diaper/clothes in the morning.  He starts cooing and blowing bubbles and kicking his feet like crazy.  We sing songs and read books and listen to K-Love on the radio.  He goes down for a nap and I can do the dishes or laundry, take my time fixing breakfast and relax a little bit before the day truly starts.  *sigh*  I had lots of trouble sleeping last night, thinking about everything I need to do to get B2 ready for the babysitter and myself ready for work. I have a feeling tonight is going to be worse.  I may need to take  Tylenol PM at 8:00 tonight.  I feel really sad but I also know that there is still hope for me to stay home in the future and that makes me feel a little better.  I was reading a mommy blog the other day and she posted the lyrics to an old hymn that I hadn't heard in a long time.  Now, whenever I feel sad, I sing these words to myself:

Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him!
How I've proved Him o'er and o'er;
Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus!
Oh, for grace to trust Him more!

I can already see God working through this situation.  Brian and I have communicated about finances and the future more than we probably ever have and I have had to test my trust in God to know that He will take care us.  So, I will not worry.  I may cry but I won't worry.

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